Clearing out...

When I say clearing out, I mean literally and mentally.  It took a couple of weeks for him to slowly let me come and get little by little all of my things from the house.  He would suck me in again and again, telling me lie after lie about how much he loved me and how perfect we were for each other.  I'm going to be honest with you, I would start to believe it when I was around him, but as soon as I was away the voice of reason (God, I believe) would tell me the truth.  The truth that I didn't need him or his lies or his manipulation, that I am and was good enough on my own.  See, I always had this vision of myself married to the perfect man, living the American dream, being so in love that nothing else mattered.  What I didn't realize is that who I needed to be in love with was God and His vision for me.  Am I here to brag about what a great Christian I am?  No I am certainly not, because I am not a great Christian, I am horrible at it and horrible at this thing called life.  I am in no way perfect, I drink, I cuss (a lot) and I sin every single day.  But what I don't have is a man telling me I'm worthless without him, that I need him to make me a better person and that I'll never find someone else better then him.  I believe God has a plan for me and I don't know if that includes a man or not, but I am learning to be okay with that either way it turns out.  I'll stop rambling on and finish telling you about the clearing out of my things from his house. 

So after weeks of no communication he finally reached out to me and said I could come and get the rest of my things.  I didn't go alone, because I had no idea what I would be walking into.  Well what I walked into was another woman sitting exactly where I had sat not that long ago.  Yes he had moved on and gotten another woman or should I say victim.  I wanted to tell to her to run, that I wasn't the crazy one and not to believe the lies.  But I kept my mouth shut and my friend and I cleared my things out and left in a matter of 15 minutes.  And I thought I was done with him and his new friend, until yesterday.  Yesterday when she called me at work and told me that not only had they broken up already but that he has now moved another victim into the house.  I believe I got out just in time.